Скоро и в России
Ожирение госслужащих Её Британского величества - это бич не только территории РФ. Пострадал даже кот Палмерстон - главный Маузер (Chief Mouser) британского министерства иностранных дел.
После полугодового отсутствия на свое рабочее место в министерстве возратился кот Палмерстон (кот сам из народа, из безпризорников. Назван в честь премьер-министра Британской империи).
Кот все это время находился на отдыхе в доме личного секретаря сэра Саймона (Sir Simon McDonald). Из-за постоянного внимания сотрудников к персоне кота у него развились ожирение и стресс.
В честь возвращения отдохнувшего и похорошевшего кота, сэр Саймон выпустил меморандум Палмерстона по министерству.
The letter reads:
"He is happy, healthy and full of energy. His pelt is glossy and mostly grown back (over grooming is, I’m told, a similar habit to human’s nail-biting; the habit can take a while to kick). His diet is regulated and free of Dreamies. We need now to keep him that way!
First, no-one (apart from his carers) should feed Palmerston. No Dreamies. No bowls of food under the desk for if he happens to drop by. Nothing!
Second, everyone must help keep Palmerston in the 'Palmerston Zone'. Cats are territorial. They fret when their territory is bigger than they can manage. They can cope with an ever smaller territory as they age. Palmerston has been king of King Charles Street, roaming from basement to fourth floor (with quad, Downing Street and occasionally St James’s Park thrown in) for nearly four years. We think he’s about six years old, ie entering feline middle age.
With the vet’s help we have mapped a more manageable territory: the offices and area surrounding the Grand Staircase. Heavy doors mark the limits, now with (discreet) stickers proclaiming, 'You are entering/leaving the Palmerston Zone'. Please respect the Zone and return Palmerston if you find him straying further afield. Bear in mind that he loves to sit beside the door and dart through, if given half a chance.
Third, everyone must respect Palmerston’s personal space. Allow Palmerston to choose whether he wants to interact with you: offer your hand as if you were introducing yourself to a stranger, and allow Palmerston to make the first move. Don’t wake him if he is sleeping. He has full choice and control of who he deigns to greet or imperiously ignores.
Fourth, my staff office will serve as both my Outer Office and as Palmerston’s refuge: Palmerston HQ. If he is in Palmerston HQ, he is not to be disturbed. Palmerston is a friendly, outgoing cat, but we all need our privacy. Like Greta Garbo, sometimes he wants to be alone."
...
Англичане добрые люди. А посему, скоро мы увидим похудевших сечинакостина и компанию. Потому как что хорошо для Палмерстона, хорошо и для суверенных (не кормить с рук. Ни крошки прожорливым! И воoбще, территорию окормления резко урезать. Возраст и кризис, но главное возраст).
Это был краткий пересказ меморандума Палмерстона.
После полугодового отсутствия на свое рабочее место в министерстве возратился кот Палмерстон (кот сам из народа, из безпризорников. Назван в честь премьер-министра Британской империи).
Кот все это время находился на отдыхе в доме личного секретаря сэра Саймона (Sir Simon McDonald). Из-за постоянного внимания сотрудников к персоне кота у него развились ожирение и стресс.
В честь возвращения отдохнувшего и похорошевшего кота, сэр Саймон выпустил меморандум Палмерстона по министерству.
The letter reads:
"He is happy, healthy and full of energy. His pelt is glossy and mostly grown back (over grooming is, I’m told, a similar habit to human’s nail-biting; the habit can take a while to kick). His diet is regulated and free of Dreamies. We need now to keep him that way!
First, no-one (apart from his carers) should feed Palmerston. No Dreamies. No bowls of food under the desk for if he happens to drop by. Nothing!
Second, everyone must help keep Palmerston in the 'Palmerston Zone'. Cats are territorial. They fret when their territory is bigger than they can manage. They can cope with an ever smaller territory as they age. Palmerston has been king of King Charles Street, roaming from basement to fourth floor (with quad, Downing Street and occasionally St James’s Park thrown in) for nearly four years. We think he’s about six years old, ie entering feline middle age.
With the vet’s help we have mapped a more manageable territory: the offices and area surrounding the Grand Staircase. Heavy doors mark the limits, now with (discreet) stickers proclaiming, 'You are entering/leaving the Palmerston Zone'. Please respect the Zone and return Palmerston if you find him straying further afield. Bear in mind that he loves to sit beside the door and dart through, if given half a chance.
Third, everyone must respect Palmerston’s personal space. Allow Palmerston to choose whether he wants to interact with you: offer your hand as if you were introducing yourself to a stranger, and allow Palmerston to make the first move. Don’t wake him if he is sleeping. He has full choice and control of who he deigns to greet or imperiously ignores.
Fourth, my staff office will serve as both my Outer Office and as Palmerston’s refuge: Palmerston HQ. If he is in Palmerston HQ, he is not to be disturbed. Palmerston is a friendly, outgoing cat, but we all need our privacy. Like Greta Garbo, sometimes he wants to be alone."
...
Англичане добрые люди. А посему, скоро мы увидим похудевших сечинакостина и компанию. Потому как что хорошо для Палмерстона, хорошо и для суверенных (не кормить с рук. Ни крошки прожорливым! И воoбще, территорию окормления резко урезать. Возраст и кризис, но главное возраст).
Это был краткий пересказ меморандума Палмерстона.